Saturday, October 11, 2008


I'm wondering about my life, whether the choices I have made are right or not. Sometimes, it seems that I have fooled myself with wrong decisions. Instead of being "just me" and choose the right path in life, I just did what other people want or expect me to do. I have not been myself anymore! Probably all I wanted was some attention or to show off what I’m capable of or I just wanted to prove that what is expected is true. I regret many decisions, and I always wished that there's a way to make things up. If I only could turn back time, I would make a lot of changes, and did what I really want to do. Alas! What’s done is done. Because honestly that person is not me. It is someone created by the society's predictions and anticipations. I had many choices. I could have been someone else doing something different from what I am now. All I have to do now is embracing my life as it is and try to make the right choices from now on. Maybe the only right thing I’ve been doing recently is trying to be honest with myself, and not convincing myself that what people expect is not necessarily is what I want. Not I’m trying to fix what has already been broken. It is more like just doing the right thing for me, and I wish it is not too late.

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